Psychological abuse, the aspect of domestic violence that’s the most elusive, endangers women the most. Fortunately, since the late 1990s, research that reveals psychological abuse and its harmful effects has been increasing. We now know that women can experience ongoing trauma, which causes them to develop serious physical and mental health problems.
One research study showed that their physical health problems resemble those of women who experience physical violence. And women facing psychological abuse are twice as likely to identify physical health issues as the women who are not abused (Coker et al. 2000). Some of the physical conditions women suffer include chronic pain, headaches, stomach ulcers, and urinary tract infections—all of which make living life feel even more uncomfortable.
An even bigger consequence is the traumatic impact psychological abuse has on mental health. Even subtle psychological abuse (undermining, discounting)—without overt psychological abuse (dominating, demeaning) or violence—can be traumatizing (McKibbin 1998). In fact, subtle psychological abuse correlates more with women’s emotional states than acts of sexual and physical violence (Marshall 1999). Here are what the studies say:
- Psychologically abused women experience depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem (Baldry 2003).
- Psychologically abused women score lower on self-efficacy, which is how empowered a woman feels to make a difference, than women who are not abused (Ovara, McLeod, and Sharpe 1996).
- When psychological abuse is compared to physical violence and other types of abuse, psychological abuse shows up as the strongest predictor of post-traumatic stress disorder (Pico-Alfonso 2005).
- Psychological abuse by far makes people more fearful than any other type of abuse (Sackett and Saunders 2001).
- A controlling partner who ridicules personal traits, criticizes, controls activities, and ignores their partner causes a loss of self-esteem (Sackett and Saunders 2001).
These findings make a strong case that, when you live with a controlling partner, it’s just not possible to feel well or to be at your best because you’re at very high risk for a multitude of health issues, including post-traumatic stress disorder. Take a moment to pay attention to how you might be feeling given what you just learned. All the ways you can be impacted can be unsettling to hear.
There is one condition in particular I want to highlight. While your feelings of self-efficacy—feeling empowered to make a difference—may be low, that terrible feeling of powerlessness is something that you can change. The hurtful impact of psychological abuse makes it all the more important for you to educate yourself, since by becoming informed you can initiate a shift that can help you start to feel some control. This book can help you create this shift as you move to knowing and then feeling stronger and empowered. Then you will have the best chance to take back control of your life.
This article is an excerpt from: ‘Women with Controlling Partners: Taking Back Your Life from a Manipulative or Abusive Partner’ (pp. 12-13) by Carol A. Lambert. Receive a Free Chapter here.
Carol A. Lambert provides 12-week recovery groups for women with controlling partners. Read more here.
Carol A. Lambert’s blog on Psychology Today.
Featured image: Harmful effects of psychological abuse. Source: Tatyana Gladskih / Adobe Stock.
