For 25 years, Donna endured emotional abuse, constant put-downs, and isolation in a marriage that left her feeling trapped and hopeless. Her husband’s relentless insults destroyed her self-esteem, leaving her convinced that she couldn’t survive on her own.
The emotional toll was so severe that Donna often contemplated suicide, feeling as though there was no way out. Despite the overwhelming challenges, she secretly sought therapy, recognizing that something in her life wasn’t right. Therapy became a lifeline, helping her rebuild her self-worth and eventually connect with a shelter that offered her a chance to escape.
Donna’s marriage had begun as a loving relationship, but significant life changes—her husband’s retirement from the military, his mother’s death, and increased drinking—turned it into a cycle of control and abuse.
When she finally made the decision to leave, she had to give up the home she had lived in for decades, as it was in her husband’s name. Leaving meant walking away with nothing but her car and her courage, but Donna realized that staying was no longer safe for her. Despite societal attitudes and advice from others—some of whom suggested she go back to her husband for financial stability—Donna was determined to reclaim her life and break the generational cycle of abuse she had witnessed in her family.
Initially shy, withdrawn, and unable to make eye contact, she gradually rediscovered her confidence through her local Women’s Resource Center. Small but significant milestones, like winning a kayak in a raffle, quitting smoking, and joining community activities like pickleball, helped Donna reconnect with the world around her.
While the process of rediscovering herself was long and arduous, Donna is now in a place of happiness and empowerment. Despite the scars of her past, she has rebuilt her life and proven that healing is possible.
Featured image: Donna tells her story of rebuilding self-worth after coercive control. Source: YouTube Screenshot / NCALL.
