Online dating can feel like a fresh start, a chance to meet someone who truly understands you. That’s what Joanne thought when she met her partner—a man who seemed intelligent, kind, and deeply interested in her. At first, he was everything she had hoped for, a great listener who made her feel special. But over time, his questions became interrogations, his affection turned to control, and his love came with conditions. The emotional abuse started subtly, but it quickly escalated into a cycle of manipulation, accusations, and gaslighting.
Like many survivors of abusive relationships, Joanne didn’t recognize the warning signs at first. By the time she moved in with him, she was trapped in a cycle of highs and lows—long stretches of what seemed like happiness, followed by sudden outbursts of anger and degrading insults. He monitored her phone, questioned her past, and slowly made her feel like she was the problem. When he slammed his fist into a cabinet during an argument, she realized things were escalating, but leaving still felt impossible. Surviving an abusive relationship wasn’t just about enduring the bad moments—it was about navigating the fear, confusion, self-doubt, and financial dependence that made escape feel unreachable.
Her turning point came when she read an article about emotional abuse and that is what she was experiencing. It described exactly what she was going through—the shame, the self-doubt, the constant feeling of walking on eggshells. She saw that it wasn’t her fault, and that she needed to leave.
Joanne had a lucky break when a pension payout gave her the financial means to start over. She secured a job, confided in a friend, and made a plan to leave. Today, Joanne shares her story to help others recognize the red flags of abuse before they get trapped in the same cycle. She wants others to know that surviving an abusive relationship is painful, but it is possible—and there is life on the other side of it.
Featured image: Joanne tells her story of surviving an abusive relationship. Source: YouTube Screenshot / MJB Productions.
