A Belfast domestic abuse survivor, Chelsea Hamilton, has bravely shared her story to encourage other women to seek justice after enduring years of coercive control and physical abuse. One year after her ex-partner was jailed, Chelsea is using her voice to help others recognize the red flags of abusive relationships and break free from the cycle of violence. Her harrowing experience reveals a pattern of love bombing, a fast-moving relationship, and the escalation into coercive control and violence.
From Charm to Control
Chelsea Hamilton’s relationship with her ex-partner began as many abusive relationships do—through a period of intense affection known as love bombing. According to Belfast Live, they met on Tinder, and from the beginning, Chelsea was drawn to his charm and seemingly perfect demeanor. He said all the right things, showering her with attention and affection, making her feel like she had found someone special. However, within just a few months, the relationship moved quickly, a classic sign of an abuser trying to gain control.
Chelsea recalls how she moved away with him to Liverpool within six months, isolating her from her friends and family. The fast pace of their relationship served to cut her off from her support system, a common tactic used by abusers to increase their power and control over their victims. Although things seemed perfect initially, subtle signs of control were already emerging. The isolation was not accidental—it was a method of trapping her in a relationship where her only contact and reliance would be on him.
“We moved away together within six months,” Chelsea told Belfast Live. “Now, looking back on that, I can see that I was moved away to isolate me and that happened really quickly and I didn’t see at the time that’s what was happening.”
Escalation from Emotional to Physical Abuse
Once Chelsea was living with him, the relationship began to shift. The early charm and affection gave way to controlling behaviors that became more apparent over time. She was cut off from her support system, and as her world grew smaller, his control tightened.
During the lockdown period, the relationship took a darker turn, with her partner becoming increasingly aggressive and controlling. Chelsea describes how her ex-partner’s behavior escalated from emotional abuse to physical violence, all while maintaining the illusion of being a loving partner in front of others. As her independence dwindled, his power over her grew, leaving her trapped in a cycle of abuse.
Chelsea’s situation worsened as the relationship progressed. The abuse culminated in a terrifying incident where her ex-partner shot a crossbow at her. She recounts how he threatened her life, following her with the weapon, pointing it directly at her, and telling her that it was for her.
“At that point I realised I had to go, that I was going to die here if I didn’t leave,” Chelsea recounted.
A Harrowing Escape
When Chelsea expressed to her partner that she wanted to leave, the violence intensified. He physically assaulted her for hours, choking her unconscious, kicking her until her ribs broke, and firing the crossbow through a door she had shut behind her.
“If I hadn’t have sat down, that would have went through me because it cleared the door and went into the concrete wall behind me,” Chelsea told Belfast Live. “He just came into the room and pulled it out of the wall and walked away again.”
Chelsea’s injuries from the attack were severe, but she managed to flee, calling her stepfather for help and he contacted the police. Her ex-partner tried to scape in his car but police apprehended him and he was arrested.
Chelsea disclosed to police that her ex-partner had stabbed her months earlier—an incident she had previously hidden out of fear and manipulation.
Justice and Empowerment
Chelsea’s ex-partner was sentenced to four and a half years in custody, with an extended three-year license period due to his classification as a dangerous offender. Despite the legal action taken, Chelsea acknowledges that the effects of the abuse continue, as does the need for her to remain vigilant. She speaks openly about the continued emotional toll, but also the immense relief and freedom she now feels.
Reflecting on her experience, Chelsea encourages other women to speak out, emphasizing that the earlier the signs of coercive control and abuse are recognized, the sooner action can be taken.
“It’s looking for the small things like the love bombing at the start, if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is,” she explained. “If something doesn’t sit right with you or it feels uncomfortable, speak to somebody about it, it doesn’t matter if it might sound silly because I didn’t know what was happening to me was abuse at all. I just thought it was all very normal and it clearly wasn’t.”
Chelsea acknowledges that leaving an abusive relationship is extremely difficult and can come with its own dangers, but it is also the path toward safety, strength, and recovery.
Featured image: Domestic abuse survivor, Chelsea Hamilton. Source: YouTube Screenshot / Belfast Live.
